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Old 11-07-2017, 11:41 AM   #1
paulo
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The many roads of life and a few words of wisdom

GREAT TRUTHS THAT LITTLE CHILDREN HAVE LEARNED:

1) No matter how hard you try, you can't baptize cats..
2) When your Mom is mad at your Dad, don't let her brush your hair.
3) If your sister hits you, don't hit her back. They always Catch the second person.
4) Never ask your 3-year old brother to hold a tomato.
5) You can't trust dogs to watch your food..
6) Don't sneeze when someone is cutting your hair..
7) Never hold a Dust-Buster and a cat at the same time.
8) You can't hide a piece of broccoli in a glass of milk.
9) Don't wear polka-dot underwear under white shorts.
10) The best place to be when you're sad is Grandma's lap.


GREAT TRUTHS THAT ADULTS HAVE LEARNED:

1) Raising teenagers is like nailing Jell-O to a tree.
2) Wrinkles don't hurt.
3) Families are like fudge...mostly sweet, with a few nuts.
4) Today's mighty oak is just yesterday's nut that held its ground.
5) Laughing is good exercise. It's like jogging on the inside.
6) Middle age is when you choose your cereal for the fiber, not the toy.


GREAT TRUTHS ABOUT GROWING OLD

1) Growing old is mandatory; growing up is optional.
2) Forget the health food. I need all the preservatives I can get.
3) When you fall down, you wonder what else you can do while you're down there.
4) You're getting old when you get the same sensation from a rocking chair that you once got from a roller coaster.
5) It's frustrating when you know all the answers but nobody bothers to ask you the questions.
6) Time may be a great healer, but it's a lousy beautician.
7) Wisdom comes with age, but sometimes age comes alone.




THE FOUR STAGES OF LIFE:

1) You believe in Santa Claus.
2) You don't believe in Santa Claus.
3) You are Santa Claus.
4) You look like Santa Claus.



SUCCESS:

At age 4 success is . . . . . Not piddling in your pants.
At age 12 success is . . . . Having friends.
At age 17 success is . . . . Having a driver's license.
At age 35 success is . . . . Having money.
At age 50 success is . . . . Having money.
At age 70 success is . . . . Having a driver’s license
At age 75 success is . . . . Having friends.
At age 80 success is . . . . Not piddling in your pants.
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Old 11-07-2017, 01:58 PM   #2
Adhikari
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Old 11-08-2017, 10:43 AM   #3
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Fabulous truths, Paul, thanks for sharing them !!!
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Old 11-08-2017, 09:30 PM   #4
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Thanks, paulo! Enjoyed the post
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Old 11-10-2017, 03:24 PM   #5
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Quote:
Originally Posted by paulo View Post
At age 70 success is . . . . Having a driver’s license
At age 75 success is . . . . Having friends.
At age 80 success is . . . . Not piddling in your pants.
How about taking these bemchmarks 20 years further?

We might might have a chance by following a proper diet, exercise, lifestyle and meditation. 20 more years to burn material karma, a blessing or a curse?
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Old 11-11-2017, 10:22 AM   #6
paulo
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Quote:
Originally Posted by mccoy View Post
How about taking these bemchmarks 20 years further?

We might might have a chance by following a proper diet, exercise, lifestyle and meditation. 20 more years to burn material karma, a blessing or a curse?
hopefully a blessing. Agree, McCoy, 80 is not that old at all anymore. In a tennis club I'm in, an 80 yo lady won a tournament while defeating some 30 y.o.s. One 89 yo man is still playing regularly with younger players, and in another group of older ladies, a 97 yo is still playing. So maybe tennis is the answer.
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Old 11-13-2017, 11:41 AM   #7
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how about expanding the parameters of human life yet another 20 years? Here's a reminder about

Jeanne Louise Calment who had the longest confirmed human

Lifespan on record: 122 years and 164 days.

It seems that fate strongly approved of the way Madam Calment lived her life.

Jeanne was born in Arles, France, on 21st February 1875 .

When the Eiffel Tower was built, she was 14 year old.

It was at this time that she met Vincent van Gogh.

"He was dirty, badly dressed and disagreeable," she recalled in an interview given in 1988.

When she was 85, she took up fencing, and she was still riding on her bike when she reached 100.

When Jeanne was 114, she starred in a film about her life; at 115 she had an operation on her hip, and at 117 she gave up smoking (having started at the age of 21 in 1896).

Apparently, she didn't give it up for health reasons, but because she didn't like having to ask someone to help her light a cigarette once she was becoming almost blind.

In 1965, Jeanne was 90 years old and had no heirs.

She signed a deal to sell her apartment to a 47-year-old lawyer called André-François Raffray .

He agreed to pay her a monthly sum of 2,500 francs on the condition that he would inherit her apartment after she died.

However, Raffray not only ended up paying Jeanne for 30 years, but died before she did at the age of 77.

His widow was legally obliged to continue paying Madam Calment until the end of her days.

Jeanne retained sharp mental faculties.

When she was asked on her 120th birthday what kind of future she expected to have, she replied: "A very short one."

Quotes and rules of life from Jeanne Calment:

"Being young is a state of mind, it doesn't depend on one's body, I'm actually still a young girl; it's just that I haven't looked so good for the past 70 years."

"I've only got one wrinkle, and I'm sitting on it."

"All babies are beautiful."

"I've been forgotten by our good lord."

"I'm in love with wine."

"Always keep your smile. That's how I explain my long life."

"If you can't change something, don't worry about it."

"I have a huge desire to live and a big appetite, especially for sweets."

"I never wear mascara; I laugh until I cry too often."

"I see badly, I hear badly, and I feel bad, but everything's fine."

"I think I will die of laughter."

"I have legs of iron, but to tell you the truth, they're starting to rust and buckle a bit."

"I took pleasure when I could. I acted clearly and morally and without regret. I'm very lucky."

(At the end of one interview, in response to a journalist who said he hoped they would meet again the following year):

"Why not? You're not that old; you'll still be here."

Last edited by paulo; 11-13-2017 at 10:59 PM.
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